And a Happy New Year

I started off Saturday by going to a protest. While I'm not a real big fan of marches, I've read about this particular protest for a while now. During World War 2, the Japanese drafted Korean women to become sex slaves for the soldiers. And for well over 800 straight weeks these living human tear drops have come in front of the Japanese in Seoul to ask for an apology.

While Japan hasn't quite offered one yet, the Japanese prime minister (aka their president) in 2007 went as far to say that "They probably enjoyed it." But he didn't quite go far enough to say I'm sorry...

And the embassy it's in Seoul? Well there were riot police to fend off 3 old Korean in wheel chairs and half a dozen nuns.

After watching that for half an hour, I headed for the bus station and caught the express bus to Busan for New Years.

Busan is Korea's 2nd city and is know for its port and beautiful beaches. Well an industrial port isn't exactly a tourist destination and the beach isn't my my idea of spending a freezing December afternoon.

I did swing by the world's largest shopping mall, but by for some reason it was closed on New Year's Day. So Korea finally has a holiday that fall on a weekend and the mall celebrates it by closing its doors? What happened to the entrepreneurial, sell you anything anywhere, spirit that predominates Seoul? It must have moved underground. At least the underground mall was bustling with amorous Korean couples buying matching underwear. (and no Toto, this definitely isn't Kansas...)

The most memorial event of my vacation took place at a coffee shop by the hands of Doctor Fish. I drank some tea and stuck my feet in bathtub filled with hundreds of Turkish guppies that wanted to eat me alive. My friend claimed they only ate dead skin, but I can't say I left my feet in the tub long enough to find out (imagine a hundred little fingers rubbing the bottom of your feet and imagine how you'd react)

I can't say I've come up with a resolution yet, but I have a feeling I'll be changing a lot in the next year...hopefully most of it for the good.

Merry Christmas to All

Koreans don't sweat in any measurable amount. As such their demand for a product such as antiperspirant is non-existent. That poses certain problems for those of us that aren't Korean. Where do you buy a product that isn't in demand?

After an initial failed effort at the local grocery store, my second impulse was the scour the local super-store, named E-mart.

E-mart, is to my knowledge, the only company that has managed to enter into a relationship with Walmart and come out ahead. You see, years ago Walmart partnered with a local company in order to penetrate the South Korean market. Walmart received a local partner in order to set up shop in a developed nation that is growing by leaps and bounds. E-mart received first class instructions on how to run an efficient store. But when the time came to renew their contract...E-mart (having learned what they needed) sent Walmart packing back Arkansas with its tail between its legs.

In Korea, there are no Targets, Fred Meyers, or Walmarts. There is only an E-mart in every town. If you want one stop shopping for just about everything that you use in your daily life...E-mart is it. If you've been to any of the above mentioned stores, you can imagine E-mart....only those stores are one 1 story....a typical Emart rises 7 stories...

When I lived Haman, every foreigner knew which bus to take to get there (the 88) Or they would just hop into a cab and say "E-ma-tu" ("E-mart" will just get you a blank stare from the cab driver...) From Migeum (where I live currently) there are 2 within spitting distance from my apartment....one is a 20 minute walk, 100 meters from the next subway stop.

E-mart is my stop for any groceries that I need that aren't at the local market. Case in point, the local store doesn't have chocolate candy that I use to keep my students under some semblance of control. They also have a selection of Belgium beers (Leffe anyone?) that makes life just a little more livable...

But they don't have antiperspirant.

My third, impulse was to check out Costco. Costco is the only "American" store that I know in Korea. It's similar to what you remember in America, only as is typically Korean, it has multiple floors.

Costco has a wide variety of products that I always bought at home. From the mega-packs of muffins, the Prego spaghetti sauce (you'll probably never realize the craving you'll have for Prego until after you've tried the unpalatable "Korean" spaghetti sauce...) cheese ravioli (or as I had to explain it to my Korean friends "cheese dumplings") and Korean oatmeal (but oddly not Quaker Oats...)

But they don't have antiperspirant either.

Hmmm.....my options were getting shorter and my imagination was running dry...So I headed to the armpit of Seoul...Itaewon... aka the foreigner district.

I have a lot of friends that love Itaewon...maybe I've just been jaded based on bad experiences...but they do have a great book store. They also have Muslims. Which I find it odd that are Muslims in Korea for no other reason than Muslims reject 2 of foundational pillars of Korean culture: drinking and eating pork.

They also have a foreign food market that manages to fill the gaps between what you can't find at E-mart and Costco. Mixed in among the Middle Eastern and Indian spices (such as authentic curry and garam masala) are staples such as Jello, toothpaste, and Quaker Oats.

Still, no antiperspirant.

So I decided to search the one place I KNEW it existed:

America.

I wrote an email to my parents urgently requesting a care package. Despite my reservations against the Korean mail system. They managed to lose BOTH of the other care packages I was sent. But they've managed to deliver the post cards sent by my aunt and uncle...so I knew that they weren't incompetent, merely kleptocompetent. This time I used my school's address, instead of my own.

And 2 weeks later (the Tuesday before Christmas), low and behold a shoe box wrapped in brown, grocery bag paper arrived at my school from my dear, sweet, wonderful mother.

I took it home after work and unwrapped it.

Only to find that it was again in CHRISTMAS WRAPPING paper! It was Tuesday....Christmas wasn't until Friday. I wanted to open up, but there are RULES against opening presents early.

So, now I had to wait to open the only package I've received in 10 months...well my opinion of my mother turned from saintly to cruel and vindictive...

I spent the day before Christmas dressed up as an unconvincing Santa Claus (or Santa Phil as my kids called me)

Regardless, I made it thru the few days. And celebrated by staying up after midnight, and unwrapped my sole Christmas present with a enthusiasm I haven't experienced since I was 10. Inside, where half a dozen sticks of the much need antiperspirant, nearly 4 boxes of pepto bismo pills (another much missed American staple that can't be found here), forwarded mail, candy canes, a puzzle, and one pair of Homer Simpson pajamas.

I spent Christmas doing a little caroling and finished it off with a white elephant party. I managed to snag a much needed 3000 won umbrella. One of the Koreans managed to snag a rubix cube. To which this high school senior scoffed, "What am I 10 years old!" Well it is a white elephant gift exchange, you're not supposed to walk away with something you like.

This is a struck me as a strange cultural divide. I've had rubix cubes on and off for years...I've twisted and turned and gotten bored with them. But it's different here in Korea. Here they're sold at the stationary stores that are on every block. They don't have just have the plain old 3X3 rubix cubes. They sell 4X4 (as favored by the Harvard bound Korean twins from Vancouver, WA) and 12 sided polygon for the masochist in your life.

Now, I made 28 some years in this world being perfectly blissfully ignorant having never completed a cube without cheating. But for some odd reason, I felt the compulsion to learn while I was here. So I, the then 28 year old learned how to solve "the cube." According to Korean high school senior that puts me on the same level as a Korean 10 year old.

But one thing I did learn by solving a rubix cube, that was that there are certain problems in life that you can try to solve by yourself....but there are certain problems you need help with. The cube falls into the later catagory. You can spend a lifetime attempting to solve it, or you can take the time to learn the half dozen patterns.

That's it 6 patterns. For all the colossal headaches that little box causes people causes, and it's that easy to figure out.

I'm not sure what rubix cube have to do with Christmas....but there it is. Merry Christmas. Glad Yule, Feliz Navidad and have a Happy Year!

Lions and Tigers and Bears OH MY!

This weekend I went to the zoo. And I actually learned something...animals just don't like cooperating with a camera. First, I should explain something...my camera also can record short videos. So if you're experiencing something that a single picture can't quiet grasp (say a large foreigner wearing skull make up riding a toy motorcycle) a brief video can really help you capture the moment.

I wish someone would tell the animals this!

First, there was this parrot...my Korean guide for the day managed to get the bird to speak Korean! I whip out my camera, only to have old Cap'n Flint revert into random whistles and clicks. Bird brain can speak more Korean than I can, but just had to get camera shy.

The other was a pair for rhinos. While I watched, the first rhino went up to a pile soccer ball sized (and let's us the Korean word here) ddong and began to roll it around with his nose. Then, he left his own contribution to the pile. Up walks the second rhino...who proceeds to roll around the steaming new ball soccer ball left by the previous rhino. I race to get this on video, only to have the rhino leave his own soccer ball on the pile.

Stupid animals...

The only animals that did cooperate were the tigers. I thought cats were untrainable...but really, all you have to do is to not feed them on Friday, then throw a few whole chicken in the cage on Saturday. Those 200 kg (500 pound) tigers will leap into the air like a kitten!

And could someone please explain why there are totem poles in Seoul Korea!

Daedun Mountain

For Halloween, the weather report called for rain in Seoul and sunshine in Busan. So when I went on a boat ride half way in the middle of those 2 cities, the weather was beautiful.

So this weekend, I looked at the weather report and saw the same...and expected the same result when I went hiking on a Korean mountain.

Man was I wrong. Instead of blue skies, I witnessed the first snow that I've seen in Korea since I first arrived. It frosted the mountains and made for a beautiful, if not chilly, hike.

I've been on a few hikes now, and I'm starting to notice a few themes of the national parks that the tours go to...

First, Cell phone coverage. I set a new record for cell phone coverage on Mt. Daedun...I sent down to 4 bars.... I don't think I've seen it below 5 bars since I've arrived here. Even on the subway, they Koreans will not be deprived of their cell phones!

Second, silk worm larva. These foul smelling and even fouler tasting grubs are available just about every tourist trap and yet I don't haven't seen anyone eat them.

Third, decked out Koreans. Koreans don't just throw on a random sweatshirt, jeans, and a jacket when they head for the hills. Koreans enjoying their unofficial national past time, MUST be dressed in the latest and greatest Gortex gear from North Face and Columbia Sportswear regardless of the actual weather itself.

Fourth, picnics. These fully decked out Koreans, will never neglect their stomachs on a hike. Case in point, on top of Mount Daedun, all covered with snow, I lost my poor meatball, when somebody sneezed...wait...that's not right...but on top of the freshly powered mountain, amidst the howling wind, half a dozen groups of ajimas and ajashis (old Korean women and men) sitting on thermal pads and sharing soju and kimchi (Korean vodka and sauerkraut)

Fifth, shops. Koreans love to set up shop to sell things. So whether you are on top of a mountain in a national park, as sure are your cell phone has awesome reception, there will be a Korean trying to sell you something. From the Buddhist monks at the top of Mount Sorrak, to the 6 separate professional photographers in the caverns, or at Daedun where you've been scrambling up snow covered rocks for the past hour....there WILL be a shop selling something!

Sixth, Stairs. I guess I'm just used to a slightly more natural hiking experience. But over and over again, the Korean hiking experience involves metal staircase anchored into the rocks. While I have to say the stairs were MUCH appreciated this trip (you noticed more with the stairs weren't there and you end up with scraped hands and a sore rear end.)

Oh...and I carved my first turkey last weekend!

Thankfully Yours

Both of these bills are worth 10,000. One is 10,000 South Korean Won and the other is 10,000 Japanese Yen. I'd have liked to add an American bill in there, but I'm fresh out of $10,000 bills...

One of these is worth about $8.50 (the green Korean won on top) and the other is worth about $120. Funny how things that look so similar can be so different.

International finance is never really something I've looked into. I've seen the infomercials on TV...the little flashing ads next to the newspapers I read online. I never thought I'd be foolish enough to waste my money gambling it on the random fluctuation of currencies. Well, that was before I started getting paid in won.

A lifetime ago, say two years, the 1000 won was worth more that a US dollar. As the world economy tanked, so did the won. So my fellow English teachers that had to move all their money at the end of 2008...watched all their hard earned money money lose 30 cents on the dollar. (and probably get no sympathy from those that had money in the stock market...) However, those people that started out as English teachers here (such as your humble author) have seen any money they didn't send home...have seen their money increase in value by 20 cents on the dollar.

You might ask, what the difference is between those who saw a 30% drop in their savings and a (so far) 20% increase...the answer is time. They got out at a bad time...and I got in at a good time. No amount of luck or research meant anything. It was what year your happened to come over here.

Fate, it seems, is a fickle mistress.

And as the the Won can buy the most Dollars in something like 16 months, I've decided to start officially saving my money.

Now, I've been saving (or attempting to anyways) a portion of my paycheck each month. But even with all those millions of Won in my Korean bank account...it just doesn't feel the same as having it back home in my American bank account. Like the great American said, "A penny saved is a penny earned." Well, until I turn it into pennies, I don't feel as if I've earned it.

The transferring process itself is as easy as paying a bill in Korea. I just log onto my bank account and make a transfer to my remittance account (an international transfer account that is tied directly to my American bank accounts). Three days later, money appears in my account back home.

There are 2 frustrating things about sending money home are the Korean laws and the fees. (and for the record, if these are the BIGGEST problems I have with sending money home...I've got it GOOD)

First, the maximum amount of money I can send home is equal to my monthly paycheck. So, while I want to send home 9 months worth of savings all as once...I've got to send it home in installments.

Second, both banks want a slice. Due to the beauty of the internet, I know how much each transfer should be worth and I know how much goes into my account. There's a $50 dollar difference. I don't like using a random ATM in order to avoid a $2 fee. So the $50 fee comes with a bit of sticker shock.

But my Korean bank wants a little bit of the action and so does my American bank, so there's not much that I can do.

Banking in Korea

I grew up in a different country, that used a slightly different banking system. I have the same bank that I started a savings account with when I was in the 1st grade. Before I came to Korea, I paid every bill that I could with a check. I've since changed, as my bills don't exactly get sent to my current apartment anymore.

So I thought that when I came to Korea, it would be the same. After all, I have a bank account and an ATM card, the same as I had back home...

Well almost....

When I say ATM card, I mean just that...an ATM card...There is no Visa or Mastercard logo on it. I can't use it to buy groceries or pay at a restaurant.

Oh, and they don't give you a check book neither...but that's probably a good thing as I don't write much Korean.

But then how do I pay my bills without checks? I use the ATM to transfer money directly into their account. This is rather strange to me, as back home your Routing and Banking numbers are closely guarded secrets! I mean back when I worked for an insurance company, that information was held more securely that people's Social Security numbers!

Well, they do things a bit differently over here.

In fact, you know what? Here...my is my banking information:

Philip Langaunet
Woori Bank
1002-275-496172

Now anyone can use my account to transfer money to me ANY time they want.

Your account number isn't really a secret. But, transferring money OUT of my account. Well, that's a little harder.

If someone wanted to log onto my bank's website to transfer all of my money to them...they would have to know:

my user name
password
have my USB drive that's on my key chain
have the bank's encryption card hidden in my wallet
and have my other banking password

OR

Having my ATM card
and my PIN

Well, yes...then if they had all that information without me knowing it...I suppose they could take away my millions (of won that is)

So, I'm pretty sure that even on the internet, that information won't hurt me.

Where was I....paying bills...

On every bill I receive, there are the banking account numbers of 3-4 of the big national banks. If you have an account with one of those bank, you can transfer the funds free of charge...if not, a nominal fee (a little more than the price of a stamp back home) is charged on top of the bill.

I don't think that much of that fee (I really don't have a choice), but Koreans on the other hand DO. Most of them will have 4 different bank accounts in order to dodge those fees.

I just wish my bank would change it's name. While the Koreans have no problem depositing their hard earned money into a bank they call "oori" I have a problem keeping my money in a banking whose name is "Woori"

Korean Megacorporations

Ever wonder how Korea went from being the dirt poor nation of goat farmers that I saw on MASH...to the nation where one of the top 20 TV stations is dedicated to a video game (aka Starcraft). From one of the most dirt poor countries in the world to a country that's has more wireless access than Microsoft.

The answer is Chaebol. The Korean world for me mega-corporation. For the last 50 years Korea has used, abused, threatened, and gamed them against each other to achieve an economic miracle. You've probably heard of some of the winners...Samsung...Hyundae...LG...the losers...well they don't exist anymore.

The one thing about this economic miracle is that it is export driven. As much as humanly possible, Koreans don't do imports. Over 95% of the cars on the road are made by Hyundae (or its daughter company Kia.)

Everywhere they can, they mentality is that they can make it here, so why should they pay someone else to make it themselves. This applies to just about everything. In fact, it's hard to find many products that are made somewhere else (besides the token, overpriced foreigner foods at the supermarket.) So instead of say a Nestle Crunch Bar or a Kit Kat bar produced by the Swiss mega-corporation Nestle...they have Crunky and KicKer made by the Korean mega-corporation Lotte.

Now what pray tell do candy, Chaebols and November the 11th have in common? Well, the Chaebols here have the ability to manufacture holidays here the same way...say Hallmark does in America. In this case, national Pepero Day. Everyone is expected to give each other chocolate covered pretzels. In fact, my students gave me half a dozon boxes of these. Or as I called them last night...

Dinner